Strangled Ducks


Why do some older women
Sound like strangled ducks,
Wear badly fitting dentures,
So each spoken word has sucks?

When do normal sounding women
Reach the duck suck stage?
Is it when they become a Granny,
Or at a particular age?

Does duck sucking start at fifty,
Or even later still?
Is the duck suck stage compulsory
Or a conscious act of will?

When they get their duck suck license
Do their baggy clothes come free,
Cardigans and too short trousers
Sold by a charity?’

Does the duck suck license force them
To cheap hairdressers’ to get
Nasty perms and haircuts
That look like snakes when wet?

I think these older women
Who sound like sucking ducks,
Know that I write about them because
They keep giving me dirty looks!

Lynne Joyce 02.09.2015